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6.20.2013

How I Learned To Meditate Without Knowing It

In my early teenage life, I discovered that I had a tendency to be violent when provoked, humiliated, and heckled. Thankfully, at a young age, I was already aware that being violent was not a good behavior, that I must avoid it, and so, change myself.

In the catholic school I was studying, I learned about the virtue of temperance. At first, I didn't understand the meaning of the word, so, I researched for it. Having understood it, the next thing I had to learn was how to apply it. But I didn't know how.

Perhaps, it was instinct or something else. I turned to prayer by quieting down. What I didn't know that what I was doing was meditating.

I learned to control my temper. Whenever I felt that the violent side of me was about to overpower me, I would sneak out to a chapel; if none was around, to any quiet place. There I would feel my heart pumping furiously and warmth would crawl from the soles of my feet to the crown of my head. Tears would well around my eyes, but actually, my eyes were dry.

In my mind, I would recall two words repeatedly: God and temperance. In a few minutes, my breathing would start to relax until my whole body, mind, and heart were in harmony again.

This practice went on and on not being aware that what I was doing was a form of meditation.